literature

chat show poetry

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divinedecay's avatar
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Literature Text

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On the Jeremy Kyle Show this morning
there was a topic about men
who hit their wives and girlfriends.
He was watching it
whilst cooking himself
an omelette for breakfast.
He always liked
to have a good breakfast.
He found some mushrooms
in the fridge next to his beer
and fried them
in hot spitting oil.
He beat two eggs,
added a little pepper
and threw it all in the frying pan
with the mushrooms
to cook together on a low heat.
With it he had some
butter-smothered toast
and some salad.
The salad was spinach,
watercress and rocket,
his favourite kind of salad.
He put the omelette
on top of the toast
and put the salad on top of that,
carefully folding the omelette over
so as the salad was inside
and then grated some cheese on top too.
He served it all up on the only
unbroken plate left in the kitchen,
a red one with
a large chip in the side of it
and a hairline crack
down the centre.
As he finally sat down to eat it
and watch The Jeremy Kyle Show
he heard me sneak out of the door
as I left the house to go to work.
The girl on the t.v. was crying.



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for all of you non-brits (or non daytime tv viewers) The Jeremy Kyle Show is a chat show here in the UK. He is quite a good host, brutally honest and very enthusiastic. He usually manages to dig up the very dregs of society to go on his show.

Now one question, obviously I get what it's about because I wrote it... but is it too tenuous for anyone else to get what's going on?
© 2006 - 2024 divinedecay
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kolotho115's avatar
The guy was either watching himself on the show or someone very very very like him, and his girl friend is afraid of him and i believe he or she was throwing plates at the other